Bakit Wala Ka Pang Jowa Bes

Sa Twitter. ‘Yan ang lugar kung saan ko madalas mapansin ang mga taong malungkot, masaya or kung ano ano pang hanash nila meron sa life. Diyan rin madalas mapukaw ang atensiyon ko sa mga taong nangangailagan ng kalinga at pang-unawa dahil sa mga pinagdadaanan nila sa life, lalo na kung mag-isa sila sa buhay. Hirap maging single baks eh. 

Maraming paandar sa Twitter. Sila yung mga gustong mapansin. Meron naming mga artists na kung ano anong sh*t in life ang gustong ipamalas. Nakakatawa. Pero madalas, nakikita ko ang sarili ko sa kanila. Kumbaga, relate si gaga lalo na nung single ako. Pansin ko nga, sa kada tweet nila, may fragment sa alaala ko na naging ganun din ako minsan sa buhay. Example, ung mga hanash nila na “Ok naman pala maging single. Daming pwedeng gawin.” Take note sa operative word – single. Siempre, ikukuda mo na single ka, para try lang na mapatibong mo si crush. So I think, let’s start there. Isa-isahin natin ang mga dahilan kung bakit kaya sila single, ayon sa general tweets nila baks. Pawang obserbasyon lang. Hindi ako hihingi ng certificate sa Philippine Mental Health Institute (not sure if this even exist), para sa mga ‘to. Natuwa lang ako sa topic. 

May pake ako kung masaktan kayo kung matamaan kayo, so please comment away! Try niyong i-defend ang kagagahan niyo. Charot lang mars. Malamang matawa lang ako at hindi ko kayo seryosohin. 

So ito ang mga dahilan kung bakit single si baks:

1. Hindi mo pa naranasan ang long-term relationship. Malamang, kaya ka nga single until now. Pero ang gusto ko lang i-point out, baka naman hindi mo na na-feel gumawa ng effort na pahabain ang relasyon mo. Isang root-cause nito ay ang ex mo ay hindi rin nakaranas ng long-term relationship. So ngayon, nga-nga ka. Try ka pa rin ng try magkajowa. Nagkakajowa ka naman pero matagal na ang isang buwan. Pero happy ako kasi nakaya mo naman. Try lang ulit. Malay mo yung next ay swak na. Pero I doubt. Haha! 

2. Dami mong arte. I-define lang natin ung arte. Ma-arte para sa akin ung taong close-minded. Gusto ganito lang, at kapag nag-deviate ka, di na niya feel. Taas ng standard sa ibang tao, pero di naman niya ma-meet sarili niyang standard. Kung ikaw ito, galingan mo pa baks. Taasan mo pa standards mo. I know it’s worth the wait. Lalo na kung 45 years old ka na. Kalansay ka na, naghahanap ka pa rin ng makakasama sa kweba. 

3. Hindi Ka Marunong Gumamit ng Social Media. Alam ko marunong ka mag-login at magcomment and all that sh*t. Pero naman kasi, puro ka kanegahan, or masyado kang ma-arte (please refer to number 2). Try mong maging genuinely na mabait. Meron kasing iba na mabait naman talaga, pero may bait-baitan. Yung mga bait-baitan, ayun, maraming pekeng kaibigan. Try mong gamitin ang Social Media to reach out, learn new things, be genuinely interested sa mga tao. Understand them. Charot. Don’t understand them. Effort ka pa. 

4. Sorry ha, pero baka kasi hindi ka maganda. Alam ko naman na ang kagandahan ay subjective. It’s in the eye of the beholder at kung ano ano pang sh*t. Pero baks, kahit mataas ang confidence mo, kung hindi ka gustuhin, eh hindi ka talaga gustuhin. Try mong i-divert sa ibang bagay. Try mong maging tunay na matalino. Hindi yung google google lang baks. Try mong ayusin ung pakikipag-usap mo. Try mong maging sincere. Pero kung hindi talaga, try mo na muna pa-diamond peel, ayusin mo rin sarili mo. Paano magkakagusto sa yo si crush, hindi ka niya maiintroduce sa mga friends niya, kasi nga, paka-chaka mo. Effort din. May mga kaibigan akong panget dati, pero nagawan ng paraan. Try mo makinig sa mga payo ng friends mo na magpaderma or magpalit ng wardrobe. 

5. Hindi Mo Kilala Sarili Mo. Pansin ko ‘to sa Twitter. Walang trend sa mga sinasabi. Or kung may trend man, pasok sa reasons 1-4. Passé man, pero be yourself. Ano ba gusto mo talaga sa life mo? Gusto mo bang maging dancer? Isang businessman? Poet? Construction Worker? Baker? Show your consistent self. Hindi kung ano-anong kagagahan. Most likely, guys would like someone consistent, or nageevolve ng onti-onti. Which leads me to – 

6. Evolve – gaga, hindi ka butterfly. Pero sana magevolve yung ugali mo, or mag-grow ka as a person. Hindi yung isang taon na, lasengga ka pa rin. Isang taon na, puro ka SEB. Isang taon na, pakatanga mo pa rin sa ex mo. Isang taon na, hilig mo pa rin mang-bash, eh hindi ka naman maganda. 

7. Takot ka magmahal. Love is a risk worth taking. Wala namang tanga na nagmamahal to begin with. Tanga lang kapag naperahan ka na or nanakawan ka na, mahal mo pa rin. Takot ka kasi baka mareject ka. Sa totoo lang, sino ba gusto mareject. Pero kasi girl, kung hindi ka marereject, paano mo malalaman kung may pag-asa ka. Si madam Auring ka ba na huhulaan lang ang feelings ni crush. Abay gaga ka nga. 

8. Choosy ka masyado. Iba to sa #2. Kapag choosy ka, ibig sabihin nun marami kang choices. Tapos yung choices mo in life, sobrang poor. Example, crush na ng crush mo. Pero ate, choosy ka sa lugar, pagkain, at kung ano anong activities. Ayaw mo mag-adjust sa kasama mo, kasi ang taas ng tingin mo sa sarili mo. Wag ka na magjowa. Love Yourself, sabi nga ni Justin Bieber

9. Tamad ka. Having a relationship take some effort. Maghatid, meet-up, magtext and all that shibambamboom. Pero since tamad ka at madalas ka tulog sa kangkungan, eh nabobore ang mga ka-date mo. You know how to change this. Matanda ka na baks.

10. You don’t have much friends. Quality over quantity to mamshie. Check mo, ilan ba ang mga friends mo from high school. Yung level na mauutangan mo. Kung more than 5 yan, well, congratulation, pang-friendship material ka lang. Hahaha, mejo magulo. Pero you know what I mean, I hope. 

11. Eto na, final na. Napapagod na ako. Last reason is… malandi ka bez. Hindi ka pwede makipagjowa kung saksakan ka ng flirt. Kahit open si partner sa ganyan, may saturation period yan. Kaya in the end, either short-term relationship ka lang, or talagang single ka for life kasi ang kati mo baks. Kasing kati mo yung dagta ng gabi at dinurog na buhok ng higad. 

So ayun na nga. Daming kuda. I’m not a relationship guru, but these are just some of the things I’ve observed in my 29 years of existence. Charot sa 29. In the greater scheme of things, ang importante naman ay masaya ka kung single or may partner ka. And by masaya, I mean, ito yung estado na nagagawa mo ang gusto mo na ayon sa puso mo at kuntento ka sa mga pangangailangan mo bilang babae or feeling babae, whichever is appropriate. At kung wala sa estado na yun, pwede ba, kumuda ka na lang ng mga bagay na tingin mo HINDI makakaapekto ng masama sa iba. In short, be considerate. Be mature enough to understand na hindi man ito ang gusto mo, darating din ang panahon na aayon din ang lahat sa kagustuhan mo. Cheka. Maganda ka ba?

A Comeback (2016 Review Primer)

I am actually supposed to do something for work but I felt this itch coming into my fingers and clicked on my blog. I am surprised to see that my last blog entry was last year. Since then, I have never made any entry for this year. What a shame.

To tell you honestly, I’ve been so occupied with a lot of things for the past few months. Good thing, they were all positive things that came along. There’s nothing to complain about and I think I’ve come into terms that we get both – good and bad in this life. If I were to recollect my past experiences, I think this year, 2016 has been so good to me. I can’t enumerate them all and I reserve them for my own for now.  But here are some of my 2016 highlights.

Work has been so generous to me and I think I’m reaping the hard work and resilience. There are ups and downs, but I’m always ready to celebrate the small wins. Part of me has grown because of the role I have in the company. I’m very privileged to have a very strong team and I’m so proud of their individual contributions. I’m so thankful for my boss and we’ve been good friends. This we found as a good formula for work relationships. We also go by the mantra of “making our people happy.” This ignites passion and keeps our office culture in tact.

In the family front, I’m delighted to have my first niece. Sister and brother-in-law is doing well in New Zealand and parents are there for a six-month vacation. I’m elated seeing my parents enjoy the snow but more importantly, I’m pleased to see their health in full-swing.

Currently, I live alone in a simple house, just a kilometer away from our old abode. Younger brother was tasked to man the old house as we have several pets there. I’m tasked to look after our property in the east of the metro, and I haven’t seen it for four months or so.

Partner and I are still going strong. He’s doing well in his new found love – business. He’ll return to corporate set-up in the next few days in Manila. We’ll live together as we sort out our future. We decided after two years that we take the next step. Our weekly house dating is just getting too short for us. We want to be together all the time. I just have one condition for him – let me do my hobby which is badminton. He’s supportive and I think it’ll never be an issue to us.

You see, despite the negativity we see in our world nowadays, I think it’s paramount for us to look on the small good things coming our way. I bet challenges will always be there, it’s part of the normalcy. One question I asked when I was in China, should we waste time in overthinking instead of contemplating how we can better ourselves and our future? I observed other countries whose people has been passionate in their own craft. They simplify, excel, inspire, they progress. I went home with that lesson in mind. 

As I move forward to another year, my fervent hope is for the people around me to feel good about themselves and start to experience growth. I was stagnant before but it takes a mindset to really change my situation. 

If I can, I’m sure you will, too.

A-Not-So Blogging Comeback

I stumbled upon Ceiboh’s recent blog entry and made me realize the same point he delivered, a comeback in blogging.

I don’t know. It’s been like 5 or 6 years from the time I blogged. The ultimate aim was just really to share stories, experiences and to document anything I feel like putting out here. As I try to relive those days where I write random stuff about love and other noteworthy ventures, I wonder what inspired me, to be honest. While I know my aim, I can’t help but get motivation from the engagement and interactions I get from blogging. It was fun and people were generally appreciative.

Most of the bloggers I know are into Twitter. Micro-blogging may have killed the blogging hobby, but I still think that blogging is completely separate from expressing mental farts, to scientific discoveries, arts, video blogging and all other platforms where you express, rant or just plainly show-off.

A lot of things have changed and mostly have infused themselves as how technology moves. Just observe how Apple technology changed the game with how we produce output at work, arts, gaming and all other things you can imagine. It’s just that crazy.

Just like snail mail, I think personal blogging should not be deterred by how we use technology in expressing and documenting our lives. Where everything now is a free-flow, the more I think that we must explain ourselves and put more color to our thoughts and feelings. We have all the technology to engage and share, what we need right now, is the passion to really connect and tell our stories with a little bit of play of words and not just turn everything visual and one-liners. Because at the end of the day, I still believe that we should elicit exchange of significant thoughts than to invite miscommunication and misinterpretation.

Do I have the time to go back to this piece of junk? Well, hell yeah. My life might have been a bore for the last three years, I am still thankful that I’m still learning a few and I’d like to share some of these things in my blog. Things changed and I know it’s a cliché. I still never outgrown my desire to really write, share and inspire others, especially those who have known me through this blog and those that I made friends with.

Just few updates about me. I’m happy with my current partner right now. We’re currently on our 16^th months and things are looking brighter for both of us. Work is tough, and is getting tougher. I work in a BPO but I’m now more than a year in the morning shift. I got a small team, but I get the fulfillment with how strong, independent and competent my team is. Family is great. Sister has already stayed in New Zealand for more than a year. We have plans of visiting her next year. I put on hold my plan of working in NZ, but I’m not closing doors and I still would want to migrate if given the chance. I started to go out again and meeting new friends has given me a new perspective in life. I lagged behind badminton, but I’m starting to pick-up on this activity since last week. I’m now staying in a new house in San Jose Del Monte Bulacan, and Bamba (my Nissan Navara pickup) is still my best companion in travels, most recent long-drive of which is Baguio. I have plans of doing video-blogs again! But I might postpone until next year, as I migrate to a new country. *fingers-crossed*

Oh life. It goes on. At my age where people think I got it all together, I think I’m in a perpetual stage of planning and really just living each day at a time. I’ve no regrets. And to my span of influence, may we all find our happiness in our journeys. 

Love Found Us

Earlier that year, I was like in a limbo hovering from one place to the other. I was in a constant search for that one person. I don’t know why, but I guess part of my DNA is the sheer passion to be with someone. My center and peace of mind revolves around the fact that I was born to love and be loved. When one can construe this a mere dependence to someone, others find this a sign of weakness and a depiction of one “hopeless romantic” micro-organism of the entire universe. Well, a news for myself, I am that person, and I don’t intend to put a stop until I find him. I guess I was never really born alone or single. It’s just not my story.

My happiness is not really finding the perfect guy that society conspicuously dictates in so many forms of platform. It’s not even in the chase. I came to conclude one day that my happiness is simply finding a person who I can love, spend the rest of my life and just open up my life so he can love me back.

Easy? Definitely not.

Finding a partner in life is like looking for a dream job. You go on dates like it’s an interview process, you go on several dates – which is like an on the job training. Come to think of it, relationship starts to be like a job and ends up being a career. Why? Because you start by doing your job as a partner, and as time goes by, you build your life and your choices based on the relationship, just like a career.

However, I dug deeper, I feel that relationships should be taken as separate entities. Your discipline in the work is something you do not apply in your love one. And when I say discipline, it’s the corporate management where you document disciplinary measures and instill progressive programs. Same goes for love-relationships, you do not kiss and hug after a terrible fight at work. Needless to say, that’s very awkward.

My contention really is this, finding your love of your life is seeking not your happiness, but the happiness of the person you've chosen to love for the rest of your life. Along the way, if your happiness and his happiness dances in unison, count not the years of togetherness because years become irrelevant for two people who signed contracts in their hearts, it’s more binding than a piece of paper.

As I aged, I realized that success for the youth are the people that have accumulated wealth over the years. In my age right now, it still applies. But as I grow older, I reckon my success is measured by how my partner reminisce the moments we shared - the problems we have solved, the laughter that made us forget, the people who we've helped, the effort we put just to see each other, how we smelled each other’s neck, how we finish the food in our plates, sharing popcorn and soda while watching a movie, the warm hug before we fall asleep, and so many others.

In our age right now, where we are busy with our own careers and realizing our dreams, I can’t help but think about my future with him. Relationship for me is not complete if we don’t share those dreams together. While I may get support and validation from my family and friends, I find my partner’s perspective a little bit over the notch than anyone else. After all, I feel that what is given by my partner is more than a validation.

I thank the universe for trusting me to love again. I am happy that I've found peace and serenity knowing that a person have seen beyond my imperfection and just accepted me for who I am. And I think the secret is just doing the same, loving the person beyond the imperfection and accepting them for who they are. 

My Blog Got Featured in damuhan.com!

This is the first time that I get to be interviewed by a certified blogger and be put on a hotseat! 

Thanks to a very good friend, Bino of damuhan.com for making me the blogger of the month of October. I'd be forever grateful for the opportunity to share my stories and insights. I super enjoyed it.

If you want to read the full article, kindly click here. 

Thought of Diaspora

This entry is written to remind myself of how it was like for me being single again. It’s been more than three months since the break-up and as I assess myself, I got scared knowing that I’ve been just fine. I just don’t find it normal that there’s no such thing as mourning or countless moments of emoness. Don’t get me wrong, I got sad, but it wasn’t perpetual as expected. I know that I should be celebrating my maturity and the impeccable way I handled myself during and after the event, which in my point of view, is a typical expectation for someone who has been seasoned and lucky to have several relationships in life.  I hope I can say it was easy but as I try to go back day by day, building this story, and recapitulating the emotions that went around it, I can’t help but realize how the impact of this, change me to view things and force me to understand better.

No one can really make a 100% effective manual to move on and overcome a painful break-up. It takes more than putting a step by step process and expect someone to run with it and have a happily ever after ending. There’s just no blanket approach. Though some people can relate, I believe the best medicine to this kind of pain is their own antidote that they themselves can create.

Work has been the best refuge so far. It is integral to me. It gave me the reason to subject myself to long hours at work, focus on what needs to be done, support the people that work for the company and for my department. Knowing the fact that I only depend on myself, I feel more the need to achieve. The salary mindset has been totally erased and for me, the paramount in my career is to be able to achieve my personal career goals. It elates me being able to touch a lot of people, inspire them to be achievers too. I realized and dawned on me my strength in helping people realize their potentials. I’m also happy to have found new mentors in my career. People who I think at some point might have lost confidence in me, but has always been patient in providing feedback and guidance. 

So I asked myself. What else can I do to enrich my life? I recently joined a speech and leadership organization, Toastmasters International. In this club, a lot of professional spends a great deal of hours to hone their public speaking skills. But on top of that – no one can deny the fact that this group is a great source of friendship and network. It was really an enriching experience to have met some VPs from banks, managers from retail industry, entrepreneurs, college students/professors, IT professionals, auditors and a whole lot more. Last Saturday, we had this small workshop about personal goals and challenges. That workshop was indeed something I need to cap that day. I was already on my 20^th hour awake from a Friday night shift at work. 

There are two things lurking my mind that moment of workshop. One is my goal of migrating to NZ. Seek better life outside the country, and number two, purchase my dream pick-up car. Obviously of the two, the easiest to achieve was the latter. I have a job that can sustain monthly amortization. I just can sell my existing ride to decrease the amount of down payment. But then again, I realized. Is this self-enriching? Is it really worth buying a new car? Will this bring long-term happiness in my life? Or will it just give me license to brag, feel good about myself and then what? 

As I try to build a plot in my head, the resounding foundation of this all is really my desire to move on with my new life. That I’m already single, that I should be opening a new chapter in my existence. That I should be thinking about my future whether alone or with a partner if ever. I’m happy of the change, but the transition really just bores me to death. Partly it’s my fault of not doing anything, or maybe I’m not pushing myself hard. 

I had several meet-ups and dates after the break-up, but then I realized, is it worth it? Or maybe I’m just not finding the right guy, or I’m not yet prepared for any guy for that matter. Is it my standards? Well I certainly don’t blame my ex, he’s really one tough guy to beat (see, I’m not a hater). Can I adjust to any guy? Then I thought of some pre-conditions. Which makes me conclude, it’s not happening, or my heart's turning to stone?

The month of June will be extra tough in terms of managing my itinerary. I’ve committed myself in adhering to my calendar of activities which points to my other goal.  A sort of stuff will be sacrificed, but I feel that there’s always a light at the end of the tunnel. I really owe this to myself. If it comes soon, I’d be stoked with the idea of a better life, not only for me, but for my family as well. 

A close friend asked, “What will compel you to change your mind to migrate?” I answered, “Two things. That f*cking Strada I’ve been yearning for years. Number two… if that someone I’m eyeing for will ask me to stay.” 

“Taena mo Leo. Ang landi mo rin eh.” And we burst out laughing. 

I don’t know. I think there are solid plans in my mind. But it’s really all up to me at this point. The universe blessed me with endless options but at the end of the day, the decision should come from the heart. 

Great days ahead I see. Great days...

So The Love Story Ends

It’s about time that I tell the story behind the heartrending tweets. It’s almost four weeks, and today should have been another month added to six years. Few more, we could have turned seven. But all stories, even the good ones, must come to an end.

Nimmy and I broke up.

He threw the towel and all I can do is yield.  No words can describe the feeling during that day, when all I thought, this can never happen.  As I try to look back and reflect on my past actions, I’m torn between thinking I was never enough or we are never in unison in our last months as partners. I was like playing the wrong tune and was playing the music out in the orchestra. I’m left out, or I left him out. We’re doing it differently, when it shouldn't be.

The sad part I guess is that I kept closed ears, and blocked the senses of the heart.  When all is falling apart, I was blinded in my optimistic view about relationship and our future. When perhaps he was crying in pain, I was there fighting my own battle in life. When perhaps I was alone and tired, he was there, he's turn to fight his own battle. That shouldn't be the case when for all the experiences I have, I should have seen it coming, and could have done something. I may have the instinct on things, but I decided to ignore and go with the flow. For I’m faced with the idea and vision of love and eternal. My vision was joy, but together, it was not.

Perhaps people reading this and have experienced broken-hearted, may relate to the pain I’m going through. It pains me too, that he’s going through the same.  But I know he is that strong because he was able to call it out on me. It was not an easy task, however I know that he’s happy in his decision. I believe it was the best for us, and I support him all throughout.

And life has to move on…

I have a career to take care of, plans to carry out, and my family who’s been very supportive in all my endeavors. Despite the many failed relationships they have witnessed, they are still there to support. I guess it was just for me to re-learn the values of love in the family. It’s a learning process, and I know that life will eventually unfold to me on greater heights. This situation also made me realize who true friends are.  To those, thanks for listening to me. The wisdom never failed me, that in times of trouble and grief, only few friends will be there to console. I’m thankful for those who understood us, and for those people who never left him. I still care for him, for I know I can survive alone.

I remember the things I learned in The Alchemist. That this relationship may have been a Personal Legend that I have achieved, one should not be discouraged to find another Personal Legend. The heart should move on, the same way that we want to discover ourselves.

As for Nimmy, I know he’s still young and I know he’ll go places. He’s smart, and he’s destined to be whatever he wants to be. I’m proud of him and I’m forever thankful for his kindness and love.

There are so many things going on in my mind, and I hope thoughts will settle soon in the form of plans and actions. I’m positive things will work out just fine. It better be.

As I try to find myself, I hope that the Universe trust me to love again soon.

Run Away to Baguio

More than a week ago, I went up to Baguio with Nimmy and five others with just one goal in mind, escape the fast-paced milieu of the metro.

It took that long for me to write this because of two things - I felt my fellow bloggers captured our story very well that I ended up thinking, I might just be duplicating parts of their work, and number two, I've been guilty of procrastination doubled up by lack of time, stress in work and endless questioning of, "How will I start?"

You see, I've been longing to have this time to escape and just adore some scenery, not think about the stressful life in the office, spend more time with Nimmy and enjoy the company of my blogger friends. After going back to work five months ago, I think I'm smart to take advantage of this time to travel, get to slack off a bit, buy some time to reflect and feel the magnificent balance my mind and heart is yearning.

Before I get to enumerate all the benefits of traveling, allow me first to give thanks to the following people. 

Nimmy - my Mahal. I'm happy he approved my traveling expense and I'm sure he'll agree it's all worth spending for. He met in advance some of the folks we were with in Baguio and I'm happy he goes along well with them too. Mahal and I shared bed and believe me, nothing beats cuddling in the City of Pines. I can never forget the time he slept just few minutes his face landed my chest. Yes, he is that tired after our first day trip. I always get to enjoy traveling because of him. He cares for me and never leaves my side. Lucky to have him as my boyfriend. 

Bino - you know the saying, "Action speaks louder than voice?" Bino is the typical guy that you would want as a friend. He listens and observes intently. His action fits for a father. He doesn't talk that much but through action he has shown care for the group. He wakes up early to prepare breakfast, he had the whole trip planned by creating the itinerary and contacting some folks for our accommodation. In other words, he's like our "go-to" person. He's like a big brother to all of us. He's overflowing with leadership and I must say, I'm one of the lucky folks to have him as a friend. He's a keeper! He easily laughs at my jokes and punchlines. A great company all throughout.

Karlo - similar to Bino, he's somewhat taciturn yet when he speaks, he speaks with sharpness and wit. He's the assigned chef of the group exhibiting his mastery with red sauce spaghetti and hotdogs! He's easy to get a long with opposed to his embedded character as "suplado." Though I can say he has that propensity at times he is quiet, he had always shown immense interest and attention when I speak, which in turns makes me earnestly listen to him back when he tells some stories.

Desoleboy - my comedic buddy. I'm not sure, but with how we connect during our Baguio trip is beyond my comprehension. Our exchanges in punchlines seemed to be endless. DB like his blog is a deep person. He might have impressed upon people his darkness in writing, but I never get to see that when we laugh. I always get to see the positive side of this fellow maybe because he has been so transparent and honest to us. I appreciate the fact that he trusted us with his friendship, and with that I'm truly grateful for. It's a pleasure to hear stories of his work, his adventures and all others. He's a genius in disguise and for a person to be like him, one can be so arrogant, but never did I feel that with him. He listens and shares, perfect formula for a friendship to last a lifetime.

Theo - the baby of the group. I can sense a neophyte blood running through him when I saw him the first time in Baguio. He's like a fragile piece in our mainstream. He's a fresh graduate, learning the ropes of career building and very idealistic in a good way. As such, I feel that it could have been our barrier during the trip, he rarely opens up to the group, yet he is receptive to our discussions. Funny that albeit our jam-packed itinerary he managed to still publish a blog that day. Feels like he has a world of his own, yet being the more matured ones we reached out to ensure he's enjoying and he gets what he need. The trip is proven to be short for us to get to know him more. But his presence really completed our entire stay, and made it colorful.

Mar - I only found lately that I've been following his blog for a long time now. During the planning stage, I get to see his Twitter name mentioned along side my name and being that stranger, I was worried that I'll be spending Baguio with someone I never get to interact with. So I followed him, he followed me back, but it was crazy that we still never had that interaction. Looking at his timeline, I can only see Instagram tweets so I can never really create a full assumption of his personality. Nonetheless, it was never a deterrent to mingle and meet new folks. I'm surprised that after meeting him, I find that we share the same humor. We clicked and it was really fun being with him. Mar was actually our assigned negotiator for cab drivers. He might not have noticed but I was observing him while he talks to the driver. He has this charisma that rarely finds rejection. He had this technique that I learned that I can find useful in the future. Mar is also generous and I find that his generosity stems from his character and the pureness of his heart.

As a group, it has been a very pleasant experience. My stay in Baguio was already complete with Nimmy all along, but the company and the different personalities of the group made it a notch higher. 

You see, blogging's purpose should never be limited to just opening your thoughts and emotions through words. It's a great medium to be heard by many. But one should never be afraid to step a little further and interact personally with people. While for some are still in the hideouts and complete anonymity, I find joy in just being myself and attract positive people to join the wagon of delightful existence. The group may have different individual point of views, religions and ages, our common denominator is to really just enjoy and avoid the misery from the workplace, finding a sense of balance and ignite the friendship.

We can never be successful in escaping the office hullabaloos, but we bring back a sense of thought that life is not all about the stress your work can bring. But you got friends and company to enjoy at your own pace.

So to Bino, Karlo, DB, Theo and Mar, may our friendship stay forever and grow more with people of the same mindset. It was an honor and privilege spending the days with you all in Baguio. See you soon!

Funny lines during our trip.

Me: Uy Mar, ikaw ba nag-grate nitong cheese?

Karlo: Uu, ngipin niya yung ginamit niya.

Me: Ah kaya pala may kick!

 (It all began with this conversation and we used "kick" in every aspect of our conversation. Crazy.)

***

Me: You know guys, ang sarap ng fruits na ito... Alam mo yun... Yung may burst of flavors. 

***

DB: Gusto ko umakyat sa taas. (Him trying to get inside a Benguet native hut, he made several attempts but was unsuccessful)

Me: So what's the struggle DB? (and DB burst some laughing)

***

Me: Oh guys picture, yung parang naglalakad paakyat ng stairs. (Mar dropping something and while picking up his stuff, I took the picture along side Bino, Karlo and DB)

Me: Ay Mar Verdan, mukha kang nagsstruggle sa picture. Are you ok?

***

Me: Jump shot! (And we almost had jump shots in every location except Pink Sisters)

***

DB: Gawa tayo ng video ng kanta ng One Direction!

All: No reaction. (Cricket sounds)

***

 Karlo: Nasaan si Theo?

Me: Ayun nag-bablog sa puno. 

 ***

En Route to Better Days

Slashed my two cards. Inspired from a good friend's blog entry.

I come from a poor family. Tracing my roots, I never heard any stories of my mama or papa being part of a well-off circle. True to the adage, “tell me who your friends are…” their friends as of the same income bracket. All that I know is that my papa used to be an OFW in Kingdom of Saudi Arabia for a decade. Through his earnings and my mom’s ability to manage their finances, my parents were able to invest on a farmland – now our mango farm, buy a house and a lot – now contested by the Araneta’s Carmel Development Incorporated (story found here) and was able to finance my college. I say we’re poor, because we always struggle until all meets end. Despite my parents investments on our farm and their sidelines at home, fact still remains, we don’t have consistent flowing income. I don’t want to dig in anymore to my sad stories like commuting to PUP Sta. Mesa just with 50 bucks daily allowance, or surviving 4 years of college just with one pair of jeans, 5 t-shirts and a sandal. Times were really tough during those days. Though it is still tough, my story now is of different leverage.

Education really prepared me. Beyond the textbooks and my professor’s lecture, I learned through meeting people. I learned the introduction to corporate calisthenics during my OJT in the Senate and DFA. I learned by listening to old people. I kept in mind their wisdom.  

As I started earning money, things changed for me and my family. I became an instant bread-winner. I sent my sister to college; my wallet has suddenly been a source of fund for us. Don’t get me wrong. I am not complaining. I love helping out my family. It was just fair for me to provide, after my parents have helped me become who I want to be and for supporting me for any endeavors I’d like to pursue. For me, it’s automatic. They never have to ask. I will give. 

To tell you the truth, I had perpetual finances issue in my life. Only until recently. 

When my income started to increase after being a risk-taker (and successful with that) in my BPO career, that’s when it all started.  I started having credit cards and purchased some loans just to sustain whatever it is I never carefully planned of, say, luxuries. Funny thing, I can never quantify which goes where, or simply which goes as to be useful until now. I was never a wise-spender, obviously. 

It dawned on me few years back that debts can really wreck havoc my future. I started to read and study. I started to get curious. However, I never did change my way of life. I know stuff, but I never do anything. But when life started to tap me (metaphorically, of course), I started to plan out my life. My bad state of affairs during being unemployed really propelled me to start writing down my action plans. 

One person that really helped me in this ordeal is Nimmy. 

Nimmy being the smartest I know in terms of handling finances, have been my source of inspiration. I share what I learn from the books (credits to sir Robert Kiyosaki author of Rich Dad Poor Dad), and he shares what he learns from his current job. It was a couple’s synergy. Nimmy works in the biggest and brightest banks of the land and strategically, he also works in asset management, the field where I can get the most of intel. More than the knowledge Nimmy can provide, is the fact that his family has well kept values in the financial acumen. The value of saving has been tremendously passed over to him, which is the same value we share now in our relationship. 

Now that my finances are back to normal, (thanks to being employed, and being more financial mature), I let Nimmy do the finance tactics for a better increase in yield. We were not wrong with the plan. I have him manage all my earnings, and for me to say the least - just keep being frugal. Bottom line, as couples, we need to be transparent all the time. I can say we’re successful. 

I’m happy to write that as of May 9, two of my three major credit cards have been cut off. If not for Nimmy, and his foresight, this could not have been realized. We plan to carry out this plan for the next 6 months and expect results. However we surprised ourselves in just 2 months! The other credit card that I have is just to take care of my car's gasoline.

Well, I’d like to put on a record that the lesson here is not to have a smart boyfriend. It could have been easier. It’s a plus, but not a requirement. Financial intelligence is just one aspect. I guess what’s paramount is the fact that I decided, I planned, and I act. In so doing, it did help me more having a partner who talks the same language. 

Knowing I’m in a financial distress is one thing, doing something about it is another.  Having someone to help out is just perfect. 

Ok, ok. I know I can’t be a savings expert. But in my experience, I really learned that money after all is not the problem. What do you think? Well your guess is as good as mine. 

So I come from a poor family. But that doesn’t hinder me from not aspiring for better and comfortable life. All it takes is the drive to learn and take action, and the propensity to control one self.  I probably read this somewhere, “Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity…” I can relate totally. 

Always take the time to prepare. Don’t be afraid to learn. Take risk. Like so many people, they failed. I do too and I will still fail some more. But I learned from them. I may have failed and left me impecunious, but  in the end, I become smarter. It fueled my desire to achieve, not only for myself, but also for my family, for Nimmy. 

"I can do anything, I believe I can do..." -Stin Hansen, Motivational Self-Talk